I get annoyed very easily these days. In my formative, adolescent years, I wandered through life blissfully unaware (mainly because I was too busy thinking about girls, boobies and how I could attain girls and boobies), but now I can barely go a minute without blowing my top over some absurd gripe. I've also started to realise that despite my overwhelming desire for change and improvement, some things are set in stone and whether I like it or not, they probably aren't ever going to change.
So, I started making a list of all of the things that annoy me, things that will never change and personal grievances that grate on me. It's my grumpy list.
This is the grumpy list #1
1: England will never win the World Cup. Sorry, but they just aren't. It's horrible to imagine, but lets face facts, England are utter rubbish when it comes to the World Cup. We can discuss tactics, not enough English players are playing in the Priemership (blah, blah, blah), but when it comes down to brass tacks (not an expression I use that often), our players just aren't good enough and they bottle it on the big stage. The good news is that now I've accepted it and moved on, I feel a lot better about it and you will too.
2: The general public will always be generally quite stupid. Most people are morons and the sooner we acknowledge that and move on the better.
3: Reality television is unfortunately here to stay. I really loath reality television. It makes the general public (the morons) into celebrities for no other reason that they're stupid and somehow got to be on telelvision. This tells our children that you can be a stupid, moronic, idiot and be succesful. I'd rather live in a world where success was based upon achievment, intelligence, compassion, culture and hard work than whether a jealous idiot roomate evicts another inane roomate because they told the tall, Northern moronic twat behind their back about their kiss with the not so good-looking, podgy rough roommate. Who cares about this asanine drivel? I just hope my kids don't.
4: Having to get up and pee during the night is just something that happens as you get older. It creeps up on you like, well, like a pee during the night. It starts in your late twenties with the occasional midnight shuffle to the toilet, but by your mid-thirties it's an every night occurance. My bladder capacity is shrinking faster than my capacity to remember peoples names.
5: Global warming will only be taken seriously by governments when it's too late. Oh, a bit of Politics. It seems so simple when you think about it. We know the problem, we know how to fix it and the governments have the power to fix it, but they don't. Why? Money, obviously. I hope they enjoy going to bed on their larges piles of cash because one day we're going to wake up and find dead penguins floating past H&M on Oxford Street.
5: Global warming will only be taken seriously by governments when it's too late. Oh, a bit of Politics. It seems so simple when you think about it. We know the problem, we know how to fix it and the governments have the power to fix it, but they don't. Why? Money, obviously. I hope they enjoy going to bed on their larges piles of cash because one day we're going to wake up and find dead penguins floating past H&M on Oxford Street.
More Grumpy lists coming soon!
This Thirtysomething Life: A Diary will be available to buy at http://ma2books.webplus.net/ next May.
Blog soon x
